Saturday, November 06, 2010
Fancam Follies Dudleys vs Sabu and RVD October 98
I posted the tv version of this but it was chopped to bits. This is the full fancam and it is really good. Sabu and RVD play the Steiners and squash the Dudleys. But instead of suplexes they use flying stuff and stiff kicks. Even the run in works because of how well laid out it is. The Triple Threat attack Sabu just as RVD dives into the third row on Bubba. TAZ HITS THE Ring and the Triple Threat smother him as the Dudleys hit 3D.
Friday, November 05, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 17
18.
"We are wrestling where?"
"Combat Collective Wrestling in Memphis Tennasee."
"Why are you wrestling there?"
"Well sir W*RE has a working arrangement with the CCW. Part of the deal was the DEATHcore champion would wrestle there three times."
I already made my first appearance there last month. Something I'll never forget. Mr.Johansen sent the Masked Confederate with me.
"Now look loosa, I will do all the talking. You are respresenteen W*RE and more impotently the Masked Confederate. So you keep yo mouth shut and I'll make sure you don get hurt."
"Yes sir."
"Good good you undastand."
Got to the Combat Club "Arena" in Memphis. Looks like a really bad neighborhood. Go in the backdoor of the building and I am more than a bit creeped out. The wrestlers are not like anything I have ever seen. Even working in W*RE and WAVE (as Greg Richards) guys were odd. But not so creepy.
I look over and I see the Combat Club Wrestling tag team champions "The Hell Machine" With their manager Azreal St.Hades. He is this really tiny skinny guy. I mean way smller than me. As for the Hell Machine One is a fat white guy named Bobo and the other is a cut black guy named Mojo. Bobo looks like his face is smeared in animal blood. Has this far away look in his eyes. Mojo looks angry and is glaring at me.
Confederate elbows me "Just keep movin loosa."
Where am I suppose to get dressed?
"It is quite simple my boy you need to get dressed behind those boxes."
"Wristlock Holmes??? I thought you worked in WAVE and how did you know what I was thinking?"
'Elementary my dear Overdog. You are not in wrestling gear yet wear a mask and had a look of distinct discomfort. So I assumed you needed to get into your wrestling gear."
"What about WAVE?"
"Oh well dear boy I am in a dispute with management over payment for services done. I feel I had a barn burner of a match with Pro Wrestler Moriarty at the last WAVE show. Yet I was not paid my due. So until then I work here."
"OVERDOG!!!! Hey don't let Holmes talk your ear off. Listen you are going to be the biggest star in the history of this sport. We are going to put your name in lights. Would you like a cold glass of Tang. Only the best for my wrestlers!!!"
"Thanks Mr.Wyles I love Tang."
That is the owner of the Combat Club, Clayton Wyles. He is called the mad professor of pro wrestling. He use to be a manager. His group was called the Wyld Bunch. He ended up merging all the Sourthern wrestling groups into the Combat Collective. Which made him a few enemies.
"I ougta punch you the fuckin face you two face piece of gabage!!!"
"Confederate why do you have to hate? I always wanted you to stay as the resident legend."
"You stole my damn Arkansas promotion. Got my son all drugged up so he would sign over my life."
"Well it belonged to him."
"Fuck no it didn't it was to a protect me from liabiliti. You know it you motherfucka!!!!!!"
Oh no Confederate is choking Mr.Wyles. Man this guy has a strong grip. What the heck the lights are flashing on and off. Oh no...... It's the TerroRantula. He is hanging from the ceiling. Before I can move he leaps down and kicks Confederate in the head knocking him out. I haven't even wrestled my first match here.
*******
"Why didn't ya help me ya god damn loosa!!!!!!"
"I tried sir. TerroRantula was just too fast."
"Look at ya. ya weigh nothin and ya still too slow to catch a beaner in a mask!!!!"
Okay honestly, I'm not going to lose any sleep over the Masked Confederate getting kicked in the head. The guy is a racist and a general creep. He is wearing a sports coat with the Confederate flag airbrushed on it. I guess he has some legitamite cripes with Mr.Wyles. But he seemed like a nice guy to me. I need to find him and find out when my match starts.
I found him talking to three guys. One of them is the Ghetto Breaker,a huge guy dressed like Tupac Sakur. Combat Club is really the only place he wrestles because of how violent he is. I remember a few local promotions in my area tried to book him. I was at that show signing autographs. Ghetto Breaker was wrestling this kid called the Grey Goblin. Goblin hosted a cable access show.
I dunno what happened but Goblin made Ghetto Breaker mad. He set Goblin on fire. Kids and parents were crying. Between legal fees and fines I think the Boy Scouts lost money on the show.
The other guy Mr.Wyles is talking to is the Master Bastard and his teenage son Kid Bastard. He popped up in Combat Club and dominated the competition. Guy is the biggest wrestler here. 6ft4 and 300 pound of muscle. Wearing these camouflage cutoffs without a shirt. Calls himself the Master Bastard because he has kids all over the world.
Kid Bastard is the oldest well bastard he has. Somebody was telling me he conceived him on his twelth birthday. He is my size. Not as athletic but he does not look right in the head. He is chewing an electrical cable. Only guy I know who can take a beating like me.
Well can't stall any longer.
"Um excuse me Mr.Wyles?"
"OVERDOG!!!! So glad to see you. I am so sorry about the TerroRantula. I swear I never ripped off the Confederate. Say would you like some more Tang?"
"Uh sure I guess so."
"Guys beat it. I need to talk to Overdog. What do you need kid?"
"Sir who am I wrestling?"
"Oh don't worry about that. You go out in a few minutes and just talk to the fans. They can't wait to see you."
Well that should be easy enough.
"We are wrestling where?"
"Combat Collective Wrestling in Memphis Tennasee."
"Why are you wrestling there?"
"Well sir W*RE has a working arrangement with the CCW. Part of the deal was the DEATHcore champion would wrestle there three times."
I already made my first appearance there last month. Something I'll never forget. Mr.Johansen sent the Masked Confederate with me.
"Now look loosa, I will do all the talking. You are respresenteen W*RE and more impotently the Masked Confederate. So you keep yo mouth shut and I'll make sure you don get hurt."
"Yes sir."
"Good good you undastand."
Got to the Combat Club "Arena" in Memphis. Looks like a really bad neighborhood. Go in the backdoor of the building and I am more than a bit creeped out. The wrestlers are not like anything I have ever seen. Even working in W*RE and WAVE (as Greg Richards) guys were odd. But not so creepy.
I look over and I see the Combat Club Wrestling tag team champions "The Hell Machine" With their manager Azreal St.Hades. He is this really tiny skinny guy. I mean way smller than me. As for the Hell Machine One is a fat white guy named Bobo and the other is a cut black guy named Mojo. Bobo looks like his face is smeared in animal blood. Has this far away look in his eyes. Mojo looks angry and is glaring at me.
Confederate elbows me "Just keep movin loosa."
Where am I suppose to get dressed?
"It is quite simple my boy you need to get dressed behind those boxes."
"Wristlock Holmes??? I thought you worked in WAVE and how did you know what I was thinking?"
'Elementary my dear Overdog. You are not in wrestling gear yet wear a mask and had a look of distinct discomfort. So I assumed you needed to get into your wrestling gear."
"What about WAVE?"
"Oh well dear boy I am in a dispute with management over payment for services done. I feel I had a barn burner of a match with Pro Wrestler Moriarty at the last WAVE show. Yet I was not paid my due. So until then I work here."
"OVERDOG!!!! Hey don't let Holmes talk your ear off. Listen you are going to be the biggest star in the history of this sport. We are going to put your name in lights. Would you like a cold glass of Tang. Only the best for my wrestlers!!!"
"Thanks Mr.Wyles I love Tang."
That is the owner of the Combat Club, Clayton Wyles. He is called the mad professor of pro wrestling. He use to be a manager. His group was called the Wyld Bunch. He ended up merging all the Sourthern wrestling groups into the Combat Collective. Which made him a few enemies.
"I ougta punch you the fuckin face you two face piece of gabage!!!"
"Confederate why do you have to hate? I always wanted you to stay as the resident legend."
"You stole my damn Arkansas promotion. Got my son all drugged up so he would sign over my life."
"Well it belonged to him."
"Fuck no it didn't it was to a protect me from liabiliti. You know it you motherfucka!!!!!!"
Oh no Confederate is choking Mr.Wyles. Man this guy has a strong grip. What the heck the lights are flashing on and off. Oh no...... It's the TerroRantula. He is hanging from the ceiling. Before I can move he leaps down and kicks Confederate in the head knocking him out. I haven't even wrestled my first match here.
*******
"Why didn't ya help me ya god damn loosa!!!!!!"
"I tried sir. TerroRantula was just too fast."
"Look at ya. ya weigh nothin and ya still too slow to catch a beaner in a mask!!!!"
Okay honestly, I'm not going to lose any sleep over the Masked Confederate getting kicked in the head. The guy is a racist and a general creep. He is wearing a sports coat with the Confederate flag airbrushed on it. I guess he has some legitamite cripes with Mr.Wyles. But he seemed like a nice guy to me. I need to find him and find out when my match starts.
I found him talking to three guys. One of them is the Ghetto Breaker,a huge guy dressed like Tupac Sakur. Combat Club is really the only place he wrestles because of how violent he is. I remember a few local promotions in my area tried to book him. I was at that show signing autographs. Ghetto Breaker was wrestling this kid called the Grey Goblin. Goblin hosted a cable access show.
I dunno what happened but Goblin made Ghetto Breaker mad. He set Goblin on fire. Kids and parents were crying. Between legal fees and fines I think the Boy Scouts lost money on the show.
The other guy Mr.Wyles is talking to is the Master Bastard and his teenage son Kid Bastard. He popped up in Combat Club and dominated the competition. Guy is the biggest wrestler here. 6ft4 and 300 pound of muscle. Wearing these camouflage cutoffs without a shirt. Calls himself the Master Bastard because he has kids all over the world.
Kid Bastard is the oldest well bastard he has. Somebody was telling me he conceived him on his twelth birthday. He is my size. Not as athletic but he does not look right in the head. He is chewing an electrical cable. Only guy I know who can take a beating like me.
Well can't stall any longer.
"Um excuse me Mr.Wyles?"
"OVERDOG!!!! So glad to see you. I am so sorry about the TerroRantula. I swear I never ripped off the Confederate. Say would you like some more Tang?"
"Uh sure I guess so."
"Guys beat it. I need to talk to Overdog. What do you need kid?"
"Sir who am I wrestling?"
"Oh don't worry about that. You go out in a few minutes and just talk to the fans. They can't wait to see you."
Well that should be easy enough.
Thursday, November 04, 2010
Doomsday in the USWA
I remember back in 97 reading about a monster named Doomsday hitting the USWA. Somehow I knew he was connected to the dead brother Paul Bearer kept referring to on Raw. When I got online I tried to find a video or even picture of the guy but had no luck. But Memphis wrestling is a lot easier to find now and I have the debut of Doomsday vs Nick Dinsmore. Dinsmore was Eugene in WWE.
I figure Kane was sent to Memphis to practice the Kane gimmick without being Kane. This i a well put together match that got both guys over. I came away thinking Doomsday was unstoppable more than I thought Dinsmore was a wimp. Dinsmore shos a lot of fire while Doomsday does not go down. Love the spot where he caught Dinsmore coming off the top and power slammed him. Doomsday hits a great looking Doctorbomb a move I never saw out of Kane before.
Savage Sports Stories Day 16
17.
"What in the blue hell is wrong with you boy???"
"I uh just wanted to help King Behemoth sir."
"You just wanted to Help!!! You coulda got your damn neck broken!!!"
Alright Sarge calm down.
"Uh look son. I'm not mad at you. I was just upset you might have gotten hurt before you met your potential. Now listen son, ole Sarge does not have a place to live. Can I stay with you while we train?"
"Oh wow that would be awesome!!!!"
********
Geez look at this dump. I think I had better digs in NAM and I mean back in 69. All these posters Spider-Man, Superman, A Batman poster on the bathroom door. Oh god damn don't tell me. He has the fucking poster for Sergent Sargent's Horse Power: The Movie.
"Yeah took me years to find one in good condition. I got that one from Movie Gallery in 94. They were about to throw it away but I saved it."
"Yeah well I don't really have any Horse Power stuff left. This crazy bi... I mean lady burned my house down with all the toys."
What the heck is this kid doing? He's taking it down.
"Here Sarge you can have it. It means a lot to me but it would mean more if you took it."
"Um yeah son that is swell. But you know we're bunk mates. Might as well keep it here. Let me take a look at that flak jacket you were wearing tonight."
*********
Silly foam??? Marbles??? Joy Buzzers???? Itching powder???? Firecrackers???? What is this Mickey Mouse crap?!?! Where are the brass knucks??? thumbtacks??? flash paper???? A big gold spike??????
"Well gee Sarge those could really hurt somebody!!!"
This fucking kid.....
"What in the blue hell is wrong with you boy???"
"I uh just wanted to help King Behemoth sir."
"You just wanted to Help!!! You coulda got your damn neck broken!!!"
Alright Sarge calm down.
"Uh look son. I'm not mad at you. I was just upset you might have gotten hurt before you met your potential. Now listen son, ole Sarge does not have a place to live. Can I stay with you while we train?"
"Oh wow that would be awesome!!!!"
********
Geez look at this dump. I think I had better digs in NAM and I mean back in 69. All these posters Spider-Man, Superman, A Batman poster on the bathroom door. Oh god damn don't tell me. He has the fucking poster for Sergent Sargent's Horse Power: The Movie.
"Yeah took me years to find one in good condition. I got that one from Movie Gallery in 94. They were about to throw it away but I saved it."
"Yeah well I don't really have any Horse Power stuff left. This crazy bi... I mean lady burned my house down with all the toys."
What the heck is this kid doing? He's taking it down.
"Here Sarge you can have it. It means a lot to me but it would mean more if you took it."
"Um yeah son that is swell. But you know we're bunk mates. Might as well keep it here. Let me take a look at that flak jacket you were wearing tonight."
*********
Silly foam??? Marbles??? Joy Buzzers???? Itching powder???? Firecrackers???? What is this Mickey Mouse crap?!?! Where are the brass knucks??? thumbtacks??? flash paper???? A big gold spike??????
"Well gee Sarge those could really hurt somebody!!!"
This fucking kid.....
Wednesday, November 03, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 15
16.
"What are you doing here?"
"Whats wrong Johansen? You begged to have me in 88?"
"You need to leave now."
"Not gonna happen. Got a contract with the kid. I'm his manager/trainer. Only way to be rid of me is to fire the kid and I know he has an iron clad contract. Guess you do those things when you're in a promotional war."
"You're going to regret this. I'm not the man I was."
"I'm not gonna regret anything. But you're right you aren't the same man. Last time we met, you were a bit water logged."
******
Mr.Johansen was really anxious to talk to Sergent Sargent. Sarge wanted to talk to him alone. I hated I snapped at King B earlier. He is wrestling Ike Simmons tonight. Ike came back early to challenge King Behemoth. Least I can do is go watch the match.
King B has quite the entrance. Has over twenty trumpets blasting as he walks to the ring and two little kids tossing rose pedals on the ground. King Behemoth use to be just Battle Behemoth. Then he won a battle royal tournament. What happened was they had eight battle royals in the biggest wrestling cities in the world. . New York, Los Angelas, Dallas, Mexico City, Tokyo, London, Memphis, Chicago. The winners met in a final battle royal at Madison Square Garden. King B won when he eliminated Ransom Fortune. Wonder what things would be like if Ransom Fortune had won.
King Behemoth is in the ring and the gun shot goes off. Here comes Ike Simmons. Ike Simmons was originally a lower card guy in WAVE. I remember watching him every week. He was actually one of my favorite wrestlers after Sarge disappeared in the early 90's. He use to be "Ionic" Ike Simmons. He was tag team partners with current CCW champion "The Dynasty" Jason Dixon. They were a really successful team called the UpStars. Had a series of great matches with the Amazing Tuxedos. They broke up after Dixon turned on Ike after the UpStars lost the tag belts to Desecration. Ionic Ike ended up losing that feud. But he never gave up on being a great wrestler.
He almost beat Ransom Fortune in a match on Typhoon TV. He did sneak attack him but he gave Ransom Fortune his toughest match in years. Until he got hit by the Ransom Note. Nobody kicks out of that. It did not hurt his career. Almost beating Ransom Fortune is better than winning other matches.
He turned up two weeks later at END GAME. He came out from under the ring and attacked Brent Stone and "Heart Burner" Freddie Marks during their cage match. After that he was the second biggest star in wrestling. He had wars with the Embalmer, Brent Stone, Freddie Marks and the Monolith.
Where is he? He should of came out by now. Wait he just came up from under the ring and attacked King B. They are going at it now. King B is really attacking Simmons ribs. Holy poop!!! Ike Simmons slammed King Behemoth thru a table. Now he is dropping a buncha forearms across King's head. But King B is shaking it off and tackled Ike Simmons. He just broke his scepter across Ike Simmons head. Okay bell is ringing. Ref is trying to pull King B off of him.
No King stop!!! He just gave the referee the Royal Treatment. Now he is tossing Ike Simmons back into the ring. No King don't do it. He is setting the chair up. No please King stop. He's got Ike Simmons over his head. Wait Ike dropped down. Oh my god........ He just hit the Ike Breaker across the neck of the chair. King Behemoth is not moving. I gotta help him.
I jump on Ike Simmons back. Hitting him as hard as I can He just slings me off of him. Get some powder out of my jacket but he threw it in my face. Cough, Cough, Cough. He has got me by my neck and things go black.
"What are you doing here?"
"Whats wrong Johansen? You begged to have me in 88?"
"You need to leave now."
"Not gonna happen. Got a contract with the kid. I'm his manager/trainer. Only way to be rid of me is to fire the kid and I know he has an iron clad contract. Guess you do those things when you're in a promotional war."
"You're going to regret this. I'm not the man I was."
"I'm not gonna regret anything. But you're right you aren't the same man. Last time we met, you were a bit water logged."
******
Mr.Johansen was really anxious to talk to Sergent Sargent. Sarge wanted to talk to him alone. I hated I snapped at King B earlier. He is wrestling Ike Simmons tonight. Ike came back early to challenge King Behemoth. Least I can do is go watch the match.
King B has quite the entrance. Has over twenty trumpets blasting as he walks to the ring and two little kids tossing rose pedals on the ground. King Behemoth use to be just Battle Behemoth. Then he won a battle royal tournament. What happened was they had eight battle royals in the biggest wrestling cities in the world. . New York, Los Angelas, Dallas, Mexico City, Tokyo, London, Memphis, Chicago. The winners met in a final battle royal at Madison Square Garden. King B won when he eliminated Ransom Fortune. Wonder what things would be like if Ransom Fortune had won.
King Behemoth is in the ring and the gun shot goes off. Here comes Ike Simmons. Ike Simmons was originally a lower card guy in WAVE. I remember watching him every week. He was actually one of my favorite wrestlers after Sarge disappeared in the early 90's. He use to be "Ionic" Ike Simmons. He was tag team partners with current CCW champion "The Dynasty" Jason Dixon. They were a really successful team called the UpStars. Had a series of great matches with the Amazing Tuxedos. They broke up after Dixon turned on Ike after the UpStars lost the tag belts to Desecration. Ionic Ike ended up losing that feud. But he never gave up on being a great wrestler.
He almost beat Ransom Fortune in a match on Typhoon TV. He did sneak attack him but he gave Ransom Fortune his toughest match in years. Until he got hit by the Ransom Note. Nobody kicks out of that. It did not hurt his career. Almost beating Ransom Fortune is better than winning other matches.
He turned up two weeks later at END GAME. He came out from under the ring and attacked Brent Stone and "Heart Burner" Freddie Marks during their cage match. After that he was the second biggest star in wrestling. He had wars with the Embalmer, Brent Stone, Freddie Marks and the Monolith.
Where is he? He should of came out by now. Wait he just came up from under the ring and attacked King B. They are going at it now. King B is really attacking Simmons ribs. Holy poop!!! Ike Simmons slammed King Behemoth thru a table. Now he is dropping a buncha forearms across King's head. But King B is shaking it off and tackled Ike Simmons. He just broke his scepter across Ike Simmons head. Okay bell is ringing. Ref is trying to pull King B off of him.
No King stop!!! He just gave the referee the Royal Treatment. Now he is tossing Ike Simmons back into the ring. No King don't do it. He is setting the chair up. No please King stop. He's got Ike Simmons over his head. Wait Ike dropped down. Oh my god........ He just hit the Ike Breaker across the neck of the chair. King Behemoth is not moving. I gotta help him.
I jump on Ike Simmons back. Hitting him as hard as I can He just slings me off of him. Get some powder out of my jacket but he threw it in my face. Cough, Cough, Cough. He has got me by my neck and things go black.
Tuesday, November 02, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 14
15.
"Okay I'm still in shock sir. Can you explain it to me again?"
"Well son old Sarge has been under the radar the last few years. Doing undercover work and preparing for a big comeback. When I saw you on tv valiantly defending your belt. My heart broke watching you struggle alone. So I said "Sarge you know what you gotta do. You gotta return and help this young soldier."
"And you remembered me from the Sergent Sargent Horse Power fanclub?"
"I sure did son. Your name was Greg Richards and you sent in your dues on time every month. Why you earned enough points for the...."
"Super transforming Horse Stable Megacarrier."
"Thats right son. Listen you have been doing good on your own. But I want,no I need you to be more. That is why I want to put you through boot camp. Would you like that?"
"SIR YES SIR!!!!!"
"good boy good."
"You going to introduce me to your friend?"
"Oh King Behemoth this is Serg...."
"Oh Overdog we know each other. I fought Battle Behemoth a few times when I was champ. How are things Battle Behemoth?"
"That's King Behemoth to you."
"Oh right right I'm sorry. Getting on up in years and I forget some things. You became King Behemoth when you won that battle royal tourney. So how are things for you?"
"Look Overdog I need to talk to you. Alone........"
***********
"Boy what are you doing with him?"
"Um that's Sergent Sargent. He saved me from the House of Bleach."
"Look I have known that guy for years. He does not do things out of the goodness of his heart. He wants some..."
"Uh yeah look King Behemoth. I um look he saved me from the House and um uh I didn't uh see you helping me."
".............Have it your way. I have bigger things to worry about.
************
"Well what did he want?"
"Uh um nothing important."
"Oh hey loser good thing your grampa was here to save your little belt."
"Who in the hell is this!?!"
"Oh Sarge this is uh Scissor Mask."
"That's Super Scissor Mask to you wimp. So who is the fossil?"
"I'm Sergent Sargent. Former WAVE Omniversal Champion."
"Oh yeah I remember you. My little brother had some of those cheap toys you made..."
Sarge is actually going to shake Scissor Mask hand. He really is a gentleman.
******
I'm shaking this clown's hand. I can see the condescending look in his eyes like he thinks I'm a joke. Now I wrench back on his arm.
"Now you listen to me you son of a bitch. If you ever disrespect me or even that kid again I will rip your god damn arm off and mail it to your mama in installments. Do I make myself clear?"
"Y yeah....."
"I can't hear you."
"SIR YES SIR!!!!!"
"Good good you're learning, spread the word."
"Sarge what were you talking to Scissor Mask about?"
"Oh nothing important just teaching him some things."
"Okay I'm still in shock sir. Can you explain it to me again?"
"Well son old Sarge has been under the radar the last few years. Doing undercover work and preparing for a big comeback. When I saw you on tv valiantly defending your belt. My heart broke watching you struggle alone. So I said "Sarge you know what you gotta do. You gotta return and help this young soldier."
"And you remembered me from the Sergent Sargent Horse Power fanclub?"
"I sure did son. Your name was Greg Richards and you sent in your dues on time every month. Why you earned enough points for the...."
"Super transforming Horse Stable Megacarrier."
"Thats right son. Listen you have been doing good on your own. But I want,no I need you to be more. That is why I want to put you through boot camp. Would you like that?"
"SIR YES SIR!!!!!"
"good boy good."
"You going to introduce me to your friend?"
"Oh King Behemoth this is Serg...."
"Oh Overdog we know each other. I fought Battle Behemoth a few times when I was champ. How are things Battle Behemoth?"
"That's King Behemoth to you."
"Oh right right I'm sorry. Getting on up in years and I forget some things. You became King Behemoth when you won that battle royal tourney. So how are things for you?"
"Look Overdog I need to talk to you. Alone........"
***********
"Boy what are you doing with him?"
"Um that's Sergent Sargent. He saved me from the House of Bleach."
"Look I have known that guy for years. He does not do things out of the goodness of his heart. He wants some..."
"Uh yeah look King Behemoth. I um look he saved me from the House and um uh I didn't uh see you helping me."
".............Have it your way. I have bigger things to worry about.
************
"Well what did he want?"
"Uh um nothing important."
"Oh hey loser good thing your grampa was here to save your little belt."
"Who in the hell is this!?!"
"Oh Sarge this is uh Scissor Mask."
"That's Super Scissor Mask to you wimp. So who is the fossil?"
"I'm Sergent Sargent. Former WAVE Omniversal Champion."
"Oh yeah I remember you. My little brother had some of those cheap toys you made..."
Sarge is actually going to shake Scissor Mask hand. He really is a gentleman.
******
I'm shaking this clown's hand. I can see the condescending look in his eyes like he thinks I'm a joke. Now I wrench back on his arm.
"Now you listen to me you son of a bitch. If you ever disrespect me or even that kid again I will rip your god damn arm off and mail it to your mama in installments. Do I make myself clear?"
"Y yeah....."
"I can't hear you."
"SIR YES SIR!!!!!"
"Good good you're learning, spread the word."
"Sarge what were you talking to Scissor Mask about?"
"Oh nothing important just teaching him some things."
Monday, November 01, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 13
13.
Been back in the States for about a week. One Man Army decided to stay in Nam. Thinks he can win the tourney for the vacant titles. Well fuck him I don't need that fat fuck. Got to the arena for this Valley of the Brawls. Show has got the gawdiest entrance I ever saw. Whatever happened to just a plain arena? Of course they don't have a real star like Sergent Sargent to draw in the rubes.
Been a slow week. Working out when I can and trying to pass the time. Saw American Beauty last night. Army kept talking about how great it was. All I saw was some pussy whining about a plastic bag. Then his dad turns out to be gay. I just don't get it. I mean I get being queer. but why the hell did watching his kid get a blow job make him want to fuck that guy? At least it killed a few hours.
This show ain't been much to watch. Saw that old cracker the Masked Confederate bring out the tag team champions. A scrawny straw haired punk and the other was a clown wearing a mask with Scissors. Thought Confederate recognized me for a second.
Boy it was fun watching them get their brains beat in by these roidheads. Think I remember them from my days as champ. Yeah Dinogore or something. Whatever I don't care. Almost worth the trip to see Confederate put thru that table.
I think this is the Overdog match. See this tiny chink walking to the ring. Wearing this hood and Swinging nunchucks.
Here comes Overdog. What a terrible theme song. Jesus he is even scrawnier in person. Oh here comes the chink, he just tore into him with the nunchucks. Busting out those fancy kicks. Cover your damn head!!!!! Aw he is sliding out now. Wait here comes he chinamen flipping over the top rope!!! Damndest thing I ever saw.
Wait he got mad and is laying into him with forearms. That's it, knock his fucking head off!!!! Now the chink just chopped him in the throat. Tosses a chair in his face.
He kicks the piss out of Overdog. Shit that kid is tough. He is still trying to get up. Overdog is daring the chink to kick him again. What the hell is wrong with this kid?
14.
Okay the match with Bingwen is not going great. Okay it is not going good. Okay okay it is going really bad. That chair really messed me up. But I have a plan. The one thing I have over Bingwen and the one thing I have over anybody is I can take a beating. I wrestled the Komodo Wizard once in WAVE as Greg Richards. No offense to Bingwen but his kicks are nothing compared to the Wizard. So I need to get him to kick me again.
WAM!!! Okay that hurt really bad. Just gotta get him to do it one more time. Got this idea from an old bootleg Dragonball Z tape I bought at a anime convention. Goku was fighting this guy in the after life and he was getting torn up by this fire kick. So he, wait here is my chance.....
I did it, I caught his leg. Here it comes, he is going to hit me with an enziguri with his other leg. Ducked it and he actually landed on his feet. I hit the Overbulldog!!!!! 1...2.... Somebody just broke up the pin and it's Freefall. The team of Johnny Cocaine and Ron Dynabul. They are all over me. Trying to fight back but it is two against one. Dynabul tosses me in the corner. He crouches down and Johnny Cocaine leaps off Dynsbul's back. I move and toss him over the top rope.
Dynabul just grabbed me by the throat. Going to hit me with the Bull Charger. C'mon gotta be something in the jacket. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Found it the old joy buzzer. to the neck. I hit him with the Overbulldog.
Last thing I see is a cloud of yellow mist.
********
Okay time for ole Sarge to jump in here!!! Twerp did a good job fighting off the bloated roidhead and the stringy haired fag. But the chink tagged him with poison mist. I was blind for three months after being hit with black mist by the Great Cambodia in 1982. Came back and broke that fuckers arm and drew a huge gate.
I hop the guard rail. The puffy guy tries to tackle me and I kick him in the chin and throw him thru the guard rail. I slide under the ropes only to see my legs grabbed by the stringy haired punk. I stomp his fingers, pull him up and hit the Bayonet.
Well well looks like I just drew the attention of the Chinaman.
He goes to spin kick me and I duck. I got the little fucker in the sargelock. He ain't goin nowhere. BAM!!!
Ugh how did he just kick me like that. Nobody is that flexible. He tries to hit me with some of that mist but I move and hit him in the gonads.
********
Haven't heard a bell so I know Bingwen did not pin me. Something has really got the fans excited. Why is Bingwen not finishing me off? Feeling thru my flak jacker. Found it, a bottle of water I put up just for this occasion. I can see a little bit now. Just see two shapes. One is big and green and is fighting a red and yellow smaller shape. That's Bingwen I run and hit the Overkiller. Boy I hope that is Bingwen. 1......2........3!!!!!!! Bell is ringing that must have been Bingwen.
"Congratulations son!!!! You're going to make a fine soldier!!!!!!"
I know that voice.
Been back in the States for about a week. One Man Army decided to stay in Nam. Thinks he can win the tourney for the vacant titles. Well fuck him I don't need that fat fuck. Got to the arena for this Valley of the Brawls. Show has got the gawdiest entrance I ever saw. Whatever happened to just a plain arena? Of course they don't have a real star like Sergent Sargent to draw in the rubes.
Been a slow week. Working out when I can and trying to pass the time. Saw American Beauty last night. Army kept talking about how great it was. All I saw was some pussy whining about a plastic bag. Then his dad turns out to be gay. I just don't get it. I mean I get being queer. but why the hell did watching his kid get a blow job make him want to fuck that guy? At least it killed a few hours.
This show ain't been much to watch. Saw that old cracker the Masked Confederate bring out the tag team champions. A scrawny straw haired punk and the other was a clown wearing a mask with Scissors. Thought Confederate recognized me for a second.
Boy it was fun watching them get their brains beat in by these roidheads. Think I remember them from my days as champ. Yeah Dinogore or something. Whatever I don't care. Almost worth the trip to see Confederate put thru that table.
I think this is the Overdog match. See this tiny chink walking to the ring. Wearing this hood and Swinging nunchucks.
Here comes Overdog. What a terrible theme song. Jesus he is even scrawnier in person. Oh here comes the chink, he just tore into him with the nunchucks. Busting out those fancy kicks. Cover your damn head!!!!! Aw he is sliding out now. Wait here comes he chinamen flipping over the top rope!!! Damndest thing I ever saw.
Wait he got mad and is laying into him with forearms. That's it, knock his fucking head off!!!! Now the chink just chopped him in the throat. Tosses a chair in his face.
He kicks the piss out of Overdog. Shit that kid is tough. He is still trying to get up. Overdog is daring the chink to kick him again. What the hell is wrong with this kid?
14.
Okay the match with Bingwen is not going great. Okay it is not going good. Okay okay it is going really bad. That chair really messed me up. But I have a plan. The one thing I have over Bingwen and the one thing I have over anybody is I can take a beating. I wrestled the Komodo Wizard once in WAVE as Greg Richards. No offense to Bingwen but his kicks are nothing compared to the Wizard. So I need to get him to kick me again.
WAM!!! Okay that hurt really bad. Just gotta get him to do it one more time. Got this idea from an old bootleg Dragonball Z tape I bought at a anime convention. Goku was fighting this guy in the after life and he was getting torn up by this fire kick. So he, wait here is my chance.....
I did it, I caught his leg. Here it comes, he is going to hit me with an enziguri with his other leg. Ducked it and he actually landed on his feet. I hit the Overbulldog!!!!! 1...2.... Somebody just broke up the pin and it's Freefall. The team of Johnny Cocaine and Ron Dynabul. They are all over me. Trying to fight back but it is two against one. Dynabul tosses me in the corner. He crouches down and Johnny Cocaine leaps off Dynsbul's back. I move and toss him over the top rope.
Dynabul just grabbed me by the throat. Going to hit me with the Bull Charger. C'mon gotta be something in the jacket. Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Found it the old joy buzzer. to the neck. I hit him with the Overbulldog.
Last thing I see is a cloud of yellow mist.
********
Okay time for ole Sarge to jump in here!!! Twerp did a good job fighting off the bloated roidhead and the stringy haired fag. But the chink tagged him with poison mist. I was blind for three months after being hit with black mist by the Great Cambodia in 1982. Came back and broke that fuckers arm and drew a huge gate.
I hop the guard rail. The puffy guy tries to tackle me and I kick him in the chin and throw him thru the guard rail. I slide under the ropes only to see my legs grabbed by the stringy haired punk. I stomp his fingers, pull him up and hit the Bayonet.
Well well looks like I just drew the attention of the Chinaman.
He goes to spin kick me and I duck. I got the little fucker in the sargelock. He ain't goin nowhere. BAM!!!
Ugh how did he just kick me like that. Nobody is that flexible. He tries to hit me with some of that mist but I move and hit him in the gonads.
********
Haven't heard a bell so I know Bingwen did not pin me. Something has really got the fans excited. Why is Bingwen not finishing me off? Feeling thru my flak jacker. Found it, a bottle of water I put up just for this occasion. I can see a little bit now. Just see two shapes. One is big and green and is fighting a red and yellow smaller shape. That's Bingwen I run and hit the Overkiller. Boy I hope that is Bingwen. 1......2........3!!!!!!! Bell is ringing that must have been Bingwen.
"Congratulations son!!!! You're going to make a fine soldier!!!!!!"
I know that voice.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 12
12.
"Son you have a cracked rib."
"Not a shock. Bruise on my side was a big hint."
"Now listen here. I can't force you but you should forfeit that belt and take some time off. Been a doctor for this promotion since it started and no wrestler has ever voluntarily taken time off. As long as they can stand and walk they'll be in the ring."
"The pay per view is coming up can I do anything?"
"Well for one thing you can take the next few days off and rest. That DEATHcore belt is barely legal and it has not been thirty days since your last defense. I'm writing a prescription for some Loritab."
"I don't like pills."
"You don't have to become a addict. just take one when the pain gets to be too much."
"Okay I'll do that."
"One more thing. Ike Simmons got five of his ribs broken and refused to take time off. That did not make him any extra money and cost him the W*RE Planetary Belt. He is a better wrestler than you will ever be. Give it some thought."
Yeah how can I not think about that. I'm the reason his ribs were broken. That R*PPED after Royal Flush I was furious. Even if I was determined not to quit I could not let Ike Simmons get away with it. I was going to make him pay. I did not know how. But had to try. I get ready to hit the ring and I'm stopped by King Behemoth.
"THINK!!!!"
"About what. I don't care if he hurts me. Besides you were the one who is always going on about me fighting back."
"Not like this you're not ready for him. You will never be ready. He's God and you're a bug. You can't get revenge against god. Know your place."
I can't even look King Behemoth in the eyes. I look at a monitor and Ike Simmons is confronting his next challenger Martin "Motor Man" Morris.
I hit the ring and jump on his back and start hitting him. He slings me over like i'm nothing. Now he is stomping me in the ribs. I poke him in the eye and try to do the Overkiller but he won't move. He slings me to the ground. Starts dropping forearms across my face. I'm still beat up from Royal Flush so hard to fight back.
He tosses me over the top rope and he starts to celebrate. Before he can climb the turnbuckle I dropkick him in the back. I go for the Overbulldog but he stops me and throws me across the ring. He is banging my head into the mat.
"If you want me to Ike Break his neck. Gimme a big old LIKE!!!!"
"WE LIKE IKE!!!!!! WE LIKE IKE!!!!!"
CRACK!!! He hit the Ike Breaker on me. His music started. He gives me a second Ike Breaker. Think he is leaving but he just grabbed a chair. WHAM!!! right across my back. He hits me over and over with the chair. He props me up in the corner and sets the chair up.
"It's time this dog got put down, what do you say!!!!!"
"We like Ike!!!! we like Ike!!!!!"
My life is about to end and nothing. Before I go under I see king Behemoth get in the ring. This was my fight, gotta stay awake to see how this ends. Ike flips King B off. They are fighting now. Just see a flurry of punches. Ike tries to clothesline him But King Behemoth presses Ike Simmons over his head and drops him across the steel chair rib first.
Never heard anybody scream like that. Ike Simmons is coughing up blood. C'mon King that's enough. Never seen King Behemoth with such a sadistic look. Using all his weight he drops the chair across the left side of Ike Simmons body. Security swarmed King while the paramedics helped Ike. I just crawled away.
Ike had a bunch of broken ribs. King was fined a lot of money. Martin Morris demanded Ike forfeit the belt the next week. Ike Simmons refused and fought Morris right there. But he was too hurt and and Martin Morris won his first W*RE Planetary championship.
"Overdog??? Overdog???? Are you paying attention?"
"Oh yeah sorry Dr.James."
Yeah I understand. I am a loser and this belt is worthless. But if Bingwen,The Warden, Murder Ranger or SAWdust want it they are going to have to kill me first.
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 11
11.
Last few days have been great. Spent every waking second with Piston Rhonda. She likes all the things I do. She thinks Ninja Gaiden is clearly better than Ninja Gaiden 2. She even has a Gameboy and plays Pokemon. The Tribe has not exactly taken me in, they refuse to talk to me, except Combo and Rhonda. The hangers on seem mad they did not get my spot.
I have been working out with Combo and it has really sharpened my game. He is an amazing athlete.
At R*PPED Diamond Phil tells us we are wrestling the House of Bleach. I'm nervous about this for a few reasons. I want to impress the Tribe and this is my first direct encounter with Bingwen. Also I'm still scared of Bleached Evil.
We are at the entrance getting ready when Combo says
"Yo man listen relax. All you are here for is to fill up space. Keep the Fire Rat off our backs. I do my magic and hit the T.CLAY.O on that translucent pussy and we are done. Have a FISTERaid."
Now the Tribe's music hits. It is this hip hop sounding song. I am trying to look like I belong, but I get lost in the entourage. Rhonda grabs my hand and pulls me forward and I feel okay.
The Eagle screeches. which signals the House Of Bleach. Coming out to this Techno song. Bleached Evil is in the middle (with Donna Weed holding on to him) wearing the Hemisphere belt.
Bingwen has a executioners hood over his face, walking to the ring stiffly. Johnny Cocaine and Ron Dynabul are gigged out and run to the ring. The fight has started. It is a chaotic scene with the entourage joining in. Bleached Evil is casually fighting his way thru them. This feels wrong, I don't want to wrestle like this.
Arrrghhhhh!!!!! Bingwen grabs me from behind and is choking me with his sash. Just as I am on the verge of fading out the referee restores order.
Tag team wrestling is different than singles wrestling and an eight man tag is different than a regular tag match.
Match starts with Combo Clay and Bleached Evil going at it. Combo is smaller than Bleached Evil. But he is such a skilled fighter, it doesn't matter. Having two hundred and forty pounds of solid muscle helps. Combo's hand being broke is not as big a deterrent as you might think. He is as good with his left as he is with his right. After a flurry of hits from Combo,
Bleached Evil tags in Ron Dynabul. Combo decides to tag in F-Type. Dynabul dares F-Type to kick him. F-Type does only for Dynabul to block and take F-Type's head off with a clothesline. F-Type scrambles to tag in Jerome Ravage.
So now Dynabul and Ravage are staring each other down. Ravage has a bit of a gut hanging over his boxing trunks, but it is not quite fat. Ravage punches Dynabul in the gut and he goes down. Dynabul tags in Johnny Cocaine. Johnny Cocaine ducks a clothesline and hits a running dropkick on Ravage. He follows it with a swinging neck breaker, following up with a fist drop.
TAG.... Oh wait I'm in the match now. Johnny Cocaine charges me and I hit a basic hip toss. This guy is so wired he can't think straight, so I can handle him. Comes at me again and I hit a drop toehold and shift it into a headlock. Pepper him with a few left hands. Johnny powers out and tags in ....... Bleached Evil.
He is laughing at me. I run at him and he boots me in the head. Gotta get up. Not sure where I am. Ears are ringing. He hits me with a powerbomb. Can't breathe, this is it. He throws me into my corner. Treated me like I was not worth pinning.
Trying to get it together on the apron. Hard to pay attention to the match. I feel it again.
TAG.... I get in and I see Bingwen. His face is painted yellow tonight. He goes for a fast kick and I duck, he tries another and tags me behind the ear. I try to hip toss him and he lands on his feet and thrust kicks me in the face. In some ways Bingwen is harder to fight than the big guys. My only advantage over guys like Bleached Evil is speed. Bingwen is faster and probably stronger than me. Not to mention having better technique.
He catches me with another kick and I realize what I do better than him. Before I can try my idea. Piston Rhonda grabs Bingwen's foot. Donna Weed just jumped on her back and they are fighting on the floor. This is terrible, I can't let Rhonda get hurt, but I can't hit Roxi. Gotta separate them. Everybody is in the ring fighting. Now we are back where we started. I separate Donna and Rhonda and everybody is booing.
People must not like to see girls fight.
BAM!!!!!!
Black out after Bingwen dropkicks me in the back of the head at full speed. Look over and Combo Clay is furious.
"What the hell is wrong with you!!!! We lost the damn match. I put my neck on the line for you with my people!!!!!"
"I'm sorry I was just trying...."
"What to win points with Piston Rhonda? She doesn't care about you. She cares about what is best for me and my tribe. At the time that was trying to bring the Deathcore championship into the Tribe without actually having to win the damn thing."
"Hey wait a sec...."
Combo hit me in the gut with his cast. Feel like I'm going to puke. F-Type kicks me in the head.
"I told you he was a loser."
Last few days have been great. Spent every waking second with Piston Rhonda. She likes all the things I do. She thinks Ninja Gaiden is clearly better than Ninja Gaiden 2. She even has a Gameboy and plays Pokemon. The Tribe has not exactly taken me in, they refuse to talk to me, except Combo and Rhonda. The hangers on seem mad they did not get my spot.
I have been working out with Combo and it has really sharpened my game. He is an amazing athlete.
At R*PPED Diamond Phil tells us we are wrestling the House of Bleach. I'm nervous about this for a few reasons. I want to impress the Tribe and this is my first direct encounter with Bingwen. Also I'm still scared of Bleached Evil.
We are at the entrance getting ready when Combo says
"Yo man listen relax. All you are here for is to fill up space. Keep the Fire Rat off our backs. I do my magic and hit the T.CLAY.O on that translucent pussy and we are done. Have a FISTERaid."
Now the Tribe's music hits. It is this hip hop sounding song. I am trying to look like I belong, but I get lost in the entourage. Rhonda grabs my hand and pulls me forward and I feel okay.
The Eagle screeches. which signals the House Of Bleach. Coming out to this Techno song. Bleached Evil is in the middle (with Donna Weed holding on to him) wearing the Hemisphere belt.
Bingwen has a executioners hood over his face, walking to the ring stiffly. Johnny Cocaine and Ron Dynabul are gigged out and run to the ring. The fight has started. It is a chaotic scene with the entourage joining in. Bleached Evil is casually fighting his way thru them. This feels wrong, I don't want to wrestle like this.
Arrrghhhhh!!!!! Bingwen grabs me from behind and is choking me with his sash. Just as I am on the verge of fading out the referee restores order.
Tag team wrestling is different than singles wrestling and an eight man tag is different than a regular tag match.
Match starts with Combo Clay and Bleached Evil going at it. Combo is smaller than Bleached Evil. But he is such a skilled fighter, it doesn't matter. Having two hundred and forty pounds of solid muscle helps. Combo's hand being broke is not as big a deterrent as you might think. He is as good with his left as he is with his right. After a flurry of hits from Combo,
Bleached Evil tags in Ron Dynabul. Combo decides to tag in F-Type. Dynabul dares F-Type to kick him. F-Type does only for Dynabul to block and take F-Type's head off with a clothesline. F-Type scrambles to tag in Jerome Ravage.
So now Dynabul and Ravage are staring each other down. Ravage has a bit of a gut hanging over his boxing trunks, but it is not quite fat. Ravage punches Dynabul in the gut and he goes down. Dynabul tags in Johnny Cocaine. Johnny Cocaine ducks a clothesline and hits a running dropkick on Ravage. He follows it with a swinging neck breaker, following up with a fist drop.
TAG.... Oh wait I'm in the match now. Johnny Cocaine charges me and I hit a basic hip toss. This guy is so wired he can't think straight, so I can handle him. Comes at me again and I hit a drop toehold and shift it into a headlock. Pepper him with a few left hands. Johnny powers out and tags in ....... Bleached Evil.
He is laughing at me. I run at him and he boots me in the head. Gotta get up. Not sure where I am. Ears are ringing. He hits me with a powerbomb. Can't breathe, this is it. He throws me into my corner. Treated me like I was not worth pinning.
Trying to get it together on the apron. Hard to pay attention to the match. I feel it again.
TAG.... I get in and I see Bingwen. His face is painted yellow tonight. He goes for a fast kick and I duck, he tries another and tags me behind the ear. I try to hip toss him and he lands on his feet and thrust kicks me in the face. In some ways Bingwen is harder to fight than the big guys. My only advantage over guys like Bleached Evil is speed. Bingwen is faster and probably stronger than me. Not to mention having better technique.
He catches me with another kick and I realize what I do better than him. Before I can try my idea. Piston Rhonda grabs Bingwen's foot. Donna Weed just jumped on her back and they are fighting on the floor. This is terrible, I can't let Rhonda get hurt, but I can't hit Roxi. Gotta separate them. Everybody is in the ring fighting. Now we are back where we started. I separate Donna and Rhonda and everybody is booing.
People must not like to see girls fight.
BAM!!!!!!
Black out after Bingwen dropkicks me in the back of the head at full speed. Look over and Combo Clay is furious.
"What the hell is wrong with you!!!! We lost the damn match. I put my neck on the line for you with my people!!!!!"
"I'm sorry I was just trying...."
"What to win points with Piston Rhonda? She doesn't care about you. She cares about what is best for me and my tribe. At the time that was trying to bring the Deathcore championship into the Tribe without actually having to win the damn thing."
"Hey wait a sec...."
Combo hit me in the gut with his cast. Feel like I'm going to puke. F-Type kicks me in the head.
"I told you he was a loser."
Friday, October 29, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 10
10.
"No you listen to me you rice eating MOTHER FUCKER!!!!! I was the god damn Omniversal Champion for three fucking years!!!! So don't you tell me what being a champion is about!!!!! I will defend the fucking belt against whatever gook you find and I'll kick his fucking ass!!!!! Oh does me sayin gook offend you. GOOK....GOOK...GOOK!!!! If you bother me again on my day off, I'll bury your rinky dink belt so far in the earth you'll have to get your fat ugly wife to sniff it out!!!!"
Slammed the phone down. The nerve of that bastard to tell me I have to defend the VWL belt. I'm Sergent Sargent. I beat Tyranos the Titan. I broke attendance records. My toys were so popular, moms got trampled trying to buy em for their kids.
I don't have to worry about this scene much longer anyway. I'll be back in America with an eager young protege. Took what was left of my savings to get an airline ticket and a ticket to that Valley of the Brawls show. Jesus who names these things. What happened to just plain wrestling at the Garden or the Omni or wherever it was I wrestled.
Get up outta this chair and god my knee is still killing me. That cheating little shit, Lightning Lord. That hold fucked my knee but good.
"YO ARMY!!!!!"
"Yeah what is it Richie."
"God Damn it Army, I told you not to call me that."
"And I told you to stop casually saying gook."
"Yeah yeah whatever ya fat gook. My knee is fucking killing me. Need you to pull it back into place."
"Man Rich I'm telling you, that is doing serious damage to your knee. You need to get surgery."
"I can't get surgery right now. I gotta be mobile if I want to get back into the big time."
"Are you sure this will even work? Just because he was in the Sergent Sargent Horse Power fan club don't mean he will make you his trainer."
"You leave that to me Army. Trust me, this will work."
Arrrggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! One Man Army is wrenching my leg back into place and it is agony. Yeah I know what you are thinking. Why is Sergent Sargent best pals with his arch enemy?
Well number one, you shut the fuck up and show me respect and number two he ain't my best pal. Turns out in NAM, I shot his mom or brother or favorite goat. Whatever I had a mission. Anyway he saw me wrestling on TEE VEE a little after I started going by Sergent Sargent. He cuts his hair into a mohawk and called himself the One Man Army.
I'm wrestling in this TV studio in Memphis Tennessee, beating up some loser who works at a chicken plant during the week. Well I'm beating on him and having fun when I'm attacked. At first I think it is a fan, but this guy hits way too hard to be a fan. He takes out a spike and carves me up. I am bleeding like a stuck pig. We set an attendance record at the Mid South Coliseum.
I thought that was the end of it. But I'm wrestling in LA and beating up some nobody who delivers pizzas and I'm attacked again. It's that fat gook with the mohawk. Before he can carve me up this time. I punch him in the throat and cut him with my bayonet. Well we feud for over six months. We have every kinda match. Straps, cages, ladders, chains. You name it and we fought in it. But I beat him in the final cage match. set a record at the Cow palace in San Francisco. I'm thinking that is finally the end of the One Man Army. But two years later he attacks me when I'm Omniversal champion.
Well you can see the pattern. He hates me and I hate him. Well I hate everybody but he got near the top of the list.
Then one night in 92. I beat him in this shithole armory in Pennsylvania. Our plane was delayed. We somehow start talking. I mean really talking. I get the sob story about his dad ditching him in his hut. But then I find out he was drafted into the Vietcong army. That he hated the military as much as I do. Not that I like the son of a bitch. Anyway soon enough the promoters stopped booking me in the States and Japan. Army said there was lots of money to be made in Vietnam. Been here ever since.
"There Richie it should hold a bit longer. You need to see a doctor."
"Yeah and you need to lose some weight. I need some more pills. Booze ain't cutting it."
RIIINNNNGGGGGGG!!!!!!!
Well who the fuck is that?
"Hello, oh yeah, listen I'm sorry about earlier, that is a terrible term to use. You folks have been so good to me, I dunno what I was thinking. Yeah book the baseball stadium. You know I'll be there. Tell your wife I said hello."
"Hey Army forget the pills. Go get some shovels."
"No you listen to me you rice eating MOTHER FUCKER!!!!! I was the god damn Omniversal Champion for three fucking years!!!! So don't you tell me what being a champion is about!!!!! I will defend the fucking belt against whatever gook you find and I'll kick his fucking ass!!!!! Oh does me sayin gook offend you. GOOK....GOOK...GOOK!!!! If you bother me again on my day off, I'll bury your rinky dink belt so far in the earth you'll have to get your fat ugly wife to sniff it out!!!!"
Slammed the phone down. The nerve of that bastard to tell me I have to defend the VWL belt. I'm Sergent Sargent. I beat Tyranos the Titan. I broke attendance records. My toys were so popular, moms got trampled trying to buy em for their kids.
I don't have to worry about this scene much longer anyway. I'll be back in America with an eager young protege. Took what was left of my savings to get an airline ticket and a ticket to that Valley of the Brawls show. Jesus who names these things. What happened to just plain wrestling at the Garden or the Omni or wherever it was I wrestled.
Get up outta this chair and god my knee is still killing me. That cheating little shit, Lightning Lord. That hold fucked my knee but good.
"YO ARMY!!!!!"
"Yeah what is it Richie."
"God Damn it Army, I told you not to call me that."
"And I told you to stop casually saying gook."
"Yeah yeah whatever ya fat gook. My knee is fucking killing me. Need you to pull it back into place."
"Man Rich I'm telling you, that is doing serious damage to your knee. You need to get surgery."
"I can't get surgery right now. I gotta be mobile if I want to get back into the big time."
"Are you sure this will even work? Just because he was in the Sergent Sargent Horse Power fan club don't mean he will make you his trainer."
"You leave that to me Army. Trust me, this will work."
Arrrggghhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!! One Man Army is wrenching my leg back into place and it is agony. Yeah I know what you are thinking. Why is Sergent Sargent best pals with his arch enemy?
Well number one, you shut the fuck up and show me respect and number two he ain't my best pal. Turns out in NAM, I shot his mom or brother or favorite goat. Whatever I had a mission. Anyway he saw me wrestling on TEE VEE a little after I started going by Sergent Sargent. He cuts his hair into a mohawk and called himself the One Man Army.
I'm wrestling in this TV studio in Memphis Tennessee, beating up some loser who works at a chicken plant during the week. Well I'm beating on him and having fun when I'm attacked. At first I think it is a fan, but this guy hits way too hard to be a fan. He takes out a spike and carves me up. I am bleeding like a stuck pig. We set an attendance record at the Mid South Coliseum.
I thought that was the end of it. But I'm wrestling in LA and beating up some nobody who delivers pizzas and I'm attacked again. It's that fat gook with the mohawk. Before he can carve me up this time. I punch him in the throat and cut him with my bayonet. Well we feud for over six months. We have every kinda match. Straps, cages, ladders, chains. You name it and we fought in it. But I beat him in the final cage match. set a record at the Cow palace in San Francisco. I'm thinking that is finally the end of the One Man Army. But two years later he attacks me when I'm Omniversal champion.
Well you can see the pattern. He hates me and I hate him. Well I hate everybody but he got near the top of the list.
Then one night in 92. I beat him in this shithole armory in Pennsylvania. Our plane was delayed. We somehow start talking. I mean really talking. I get the sob story about his dad ditching him in his hut. But then I find out he was drafted into the Vietcong army. That he hated the military as much as I do. Not that I like the son of a bitch. Anyway soon enough the promoters stopped booking me in the States and Japan. Army said there was lots of money to be made in Vietnam. Been here ever since.
"There Richie it should hold a bit longer. You need to see a doctor."
"Yeah and you need to lose some weight. I need some more pills. Booze ain't cutting it."
RIIINNNNGGGGGGG!!!!!!!
Well who the fuck is that?
"Hello, oh yeah, listen I'm sorry about earlier, that is a terrible term to use. You folks have been so good to me, I dunno what I was thinking. Yeah book the baseball stadium. You know I'll be there. Tell your wife I said hello."
"Hey Army forget the pills. Go get some shovels."
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 9
9.
A Tribe Called FIST? Why would they want to meet me. Well I have an idea why. I wrestled all three members of a Tribe Called Fist over the years. They are
F-Type: He is supposed to be a famous kickboxer. I looked him up online and he has a good record and won a belt or two. Rumor has it his career was cut short after a fight in Thailand. He claimed the Thai champ was taking cheapshots. In the second round he hid a needle in his glove and really messed the Thai champ up. Combo Clay got him signed to W*RE. Guy is not much of a wrestler. I had him on the ropes using basic wrestling. Then he started laying in the punches and kicks. He knocked me unconcious with the first kick.
Jerome "Journeyman" Ravage: I dunno much about him. He is more the mascot for the group. I know he was a journeyman boxer. Again not much of a wrestler. But he is so strong he is hard to beat.With him a bodyslam is a potential finisher. I could out wrestle him, but one punch to the jaw and I was out.
Combo Clay is the undisputed Chief of the Tribe. He is a multi sport athlete. He has won the golden gloves and was a NCAA wrestling champion. Not to mention playing football and baseball. He was banned from pro boxing after he punched a guy below the belt and suplexed him over the top rope. So he turned up in pro wrestling.
He is a former West Coast Heritage and Hemisphere champion. He traded the Hemisphere with Bleached Evil over a two week period. Those were some exciting matches. All the boys would gather around the entrance to watch them. Clay could toss around Evil with ease. One night he actually knocked him out with a left hand. Bleached Evil filed a protest and the decision was overturned.
Bleached Evil won the rubber match at Royal Flush. In the process he also broke Clay's hand with a steel chair and ring steps.
They have a cheerleader named Piston Rhonda. She is the only woman ever banned from Foxy Boxing and jello wrestling.
I'm at the dressing room of A Tribe Called FIST. These huge guys in track suits, are standing in front of me. I show them the note and they let me pass.
Another thing about the Tribe is, they have lots of hangers on. Room is filled with guys wearing the Black, gold and Red tracksuits.
"What a cute puppy."
There she is Piston Rhonda, she has this red and black cheerleader outfit on. She has dark hair and big brown eyes. Okay I have a crush on her and she makes me really nervous. I think she knows, because she makes a point to talk to me and rub my shoulders. I tried not to think about it. But with Janet gone, it is inviting.
"Rhonda get your hands off my guest!!!"
It's Combo Clay himself.
"Uh sir I got this letter from you."
"Yeah yeah, Overdog good to see you. Congrats on winning the Deathcore belt. Looks good on you. Here have some FisterAid. Its an energy drink I am endorsing."
Stuff is kinda beige looking. Don't wanna be rude and I am thirsty. So I'll take a sup. HOLY!!!! Wow that is tart. I feel like I just ate a lemon filled with sugar. I finish it off in two glugs.
"Yeah good to see you like it. You got any idea why you are here?"
God I want another Fisteraid. I could drink an entire case.
"I figure something about Bleached Evil."
"You are pretty sharp Overdog. Hey you want another Fister. You polished off the first one fast."
Oh god yes. I chug this one down.
Then F-Type speaks up
"Look we do not need this loser. The three of us get along just fine."
"Look The House of Bleach use to only be three guys. Now they got that rat guy and last time we mixed it up, he kicked your head in."
"Man I told you he hit me with that purple mist. He never could of clocked me any other way."
"Yeah well, he isn't gonna stop using the mist. We need a fourth man."
"But I told you I can load up the stinger."
"And I told you to stop using the damn stinger. They are ready to suspend your ass and I am tired of paying fines out of pocket."
Watching them go back and forth, I notice Jerome Ravage has not said one word. I also notice he is glaring at me. I need to speak up.
"Um Mr.Clay can't you make one of these other guys your forth man."
"No no these guys can't hang with the House of Bleach. Most of these guys are friends and well wishers. I hook them up with some steady play and they run interference or deal with my needs. The rest are students who are not ready to enter a pro sports environment. We want you to be our forth man. We know you want to get back at that Fire Rat guy."
"His name is Bingwen and I want to help him."
"Yeah whatever, look you help us out and there are things we can do for you. Things you never thought of."
I feel someone grab my hand. It's Piston Rhonda.
A Tribe Called FIST? Why would they want to meet me. Well I have an idea why. I wrestled all three members of a Tribe Called Fist over the years. They are
F-Type: He is supposed to be a famous kickboxer. I looked him up online and he has a good record and won a belt or two. Rumor has it his career was cut short after a fight in Thailand. He claimed the Thai champ was taking cheapshots. In the second round he hid a needle in his glove and really messed the Thai champ up. Combo Clay got him signed to W*RE. Guy is not much of a wrestler. I had him on the ropes using basic wrestling. Then he started laying in the punches and kicks. He knocked me unconcious with the first kick.
Jerome "Journeyman" Ravage: I dunno much about him. He is more the mascot for the group. I know he was a journeyman boxer. Again not much of a wrestler. But he is so strong he is hard to beat.With him a bodyslam is a potential finisher. I could out wrestle him, but one punch to the jaw and I was out.
Combo Clay is the undisputed Chief of the Tribe. He is a multi sport athlete. He has won the golden gloves and was a NCAA wrestling champion. Not to mention playing football and baseball. He was banned from pro boxing after he punched a guy below the belt and suplexed him over the top rope. So he turned up in pro wrestling.
He is a former West Coast Heritage and Hemisphere champion. He traded the Hemisphere with Bleached Evil over a two week period. Those were some exciting matches. All the boys would gather around the entrance to watch them. Clay could toss around Evil with ease. One night he actually knocked him out with a left hand. Bleached Evil filed a protest and the decision was overturned.
Bleached Evil won the rubber match at Royal Flush. In the process he also broke Clay's hand with a steel chair and ring steps.
They have a cheerleader named Piston Rhonda. She is the only woman ever banned from Foxy Boxing and jello wrestling.
I'm at the dressing room of A Tribe Called FIST. These huge guys in track suits, are standing in front of me. I show them the note and they let me pass.
Another thing about the Tribe is, they have lots of hangers on. Room is filled with guys wearing the Black, gold and Red tracksuits.
"What a cute puppy."
There she is Piston Rhonda, she has this red and black cheerleader outfit on. She has dark hair and big brown eyes. Okay I have a crush on her and she makes me really nervous. I think she knows, because she makes a point to talk to me and rub my shoulders. I tried not to think about it. But with Janet gone, it is inviting.
"Rhonda get your hands off my guest!!!"
It's Combo Clay himself.
"Uh sir I got this letter from you."
"Yeah yeah, Overdog good to see you. Congrats on winning the Deathcore belt. Looks good on you. Here have some FisterAid. Its an energy drink I am endorsing."
Stuff is kinda beige looking. Don't wanna be rude and I am thirsty. So I'll take a sup. HOLY!!!! Wow that is tart. I feel like I just ate a lemon filled with sugar. I finish it off in two glugs.
"Yeah good to see you like it. You got any idea why you are here?"
God I want another Fisteraid. I could drink an entire case.
"I figure something about Bleached Evil."
"You are pretty sharp Overdog. Hey you want another Fister. You polished off the first one fast."
Oh god yes. I chug this one down.
Then F-Type speaks up
"Look we do not need this loser. The three of us get along just fine."
"Look The House of Bleach use to only be three guys. Now they got that rat guy and last time we mixed it up, he kicked your head in."
"Man I told you he hit me with that purple mist. He never could of clocked me any other way."
"Yeah well, he isn't gonna stop using the mist. We need a fourth man."
"But I told you I can load up the stinger."
"And I told you to stop using the damn stinger. They are ready to suspend your ass and I am tired of paying fines out of pocket."
Watching them go back and forth, I notice Jerome Ravage has not said one word. I also notice he is glaring at me. I need to speak up.
"Um Mr.Clay can't you make one of these other guys your forth man."
"No no these guys can't hang with the House of Bleach. Most of these guys are friends and well wishers. I hook them up with some steady play and they run interference or deal with my needs. The rest are students who are not ready to enter a pro sports environment. We want you to be our forth man. We know you want to get back at that Fire Rat guy."
"His name is Bingwen and I want to help him."
"Yeah whatever, look you help us out and there are things we can do for you. Things you never thought of."
I feel someone grab my hand. It's Piston Rhonda.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 8
8.
After the match with SAWdust I am wiped. The Deathcore schedule is brutal. Between Murder Ranger, Warden and SAWdust I get no rest. These guys attack me in the ring, parking lot, locker room and motel. Janet swore she had seen somebody matching SAWdust description, lurking around the apartment complex.
Speaking of Janet, things have been better. She went ballistic when she saw me come home with the Deathcore title. We fought for three days about it. She wanted me to forfeit the belt and I refused. Before that, she had been distant and moody. I ask her what is going on and she says she needs space. I'm on the road five days a week. So that confuses me.
Anyway wasted enough time thinking about her. This thing with Bingwen and Bleached Evil is scary. Bleached Evil has been Hemisphere champion for eight months now. Not counting the period him and Combo Clay traded the belt four times in a month. Bleached Evil has dominated the competition. Both with his size and quickness. But also by having dedicated followers. Followers like
The tag team "Freefall" Johnny Cocaine and Ron Dynabul with their valet Donna Weed. Before meeting Bleached Evil they were lower on the card than me. My first win as Overdog was against Johnny Cocaine. He was Jonathon Summers then, a British wrestler with a smiley face sun on his trunks. Really good technician, but I beat him with the Overbulldog.
Then there was Ron Dynabull. He was another British wrestler named Strong Davis. When I wrestled him he was fifty pounds lighter than he is now. He was still a good bit bigger than me, but I got the better of him. I was a lot faster and pinned him with a victory roll.
A little bit after that match, Strong had his run in with the debuting Bleached Evil. Evil took him apart. After pinning him with the Bleach Blast, he shoved Strong Davis in a body bag and carried him off. A few weeks later he appeared as Ron Dynabul . He brutalized Jonathon Summers in a match on T*RN. Weeks later Summers had transformed into Johnny Cocaine. I did not even recognize him, til Scissor Mask pointed it out.
I don't know where Donna Weed came from. She is way too small and tiny to be a lady wrestler. But she follows Bleached Evil every where. She is willing to fight anybody for him. I remember when Cocaine and Dynabull wrestled DinoWAR. The Dinos valet Alosaur powerbombed her on the floor. It looked she was broke in half, but Roxi kept trying to get up.
As for Bleached Evil. I saw pictures of him wrestling in Japan in PWEYE. Called himself Opium X. He defeated Komodo Wizard for the WHY Heavyweight title. Legend has it X had developed an immunity to poison mist. So when Komodo spit the black mist in his face. Opium X simply hit him with the Poppi gun and pinned him.
He kept the WHY Belt for a long time. Til he lost it to King Behemoth at the Tokyo Dome. King even ripped his mask off. To this day Bleached Evil swears he was never Opium X. Pointing out that Opium X still works in Japan and WAVE. I asked King Behemoth about that a few weeks ago. Normally King B ignores me or says something mean when I ask him a question. But here he gave me a straight answer.
"I dunno about before that match or after. But that day at the Tokyo Dome, it was Bleached Evil under the hood. NOW GET THE HELL OUT!!!!"
He sure is grouchy using the bathroom.
Ready To leave the arena when a guy wearing a black tracksuit walks up and hands me a note.
"Your presence is requested by a Tribe Called Fist."
After the match with SAWdust I am wiped. The Deathcore schedule is brutal. Between Murder Ranger, Warden and SAWdust I get no rest. These guys attack me in the ring, parking lot, locker room and motel. Janet swore she had seen somebody matching SAWdust description, lurking around the apartment complex.
Speaking of Janet, things have been better. She went ballistic when she saw me come home with the Deathcore title. We fought for three days about it. She wanted me to forfeit the belt and I refused. Before that, she had been distant and moody. I ask her what is going on and she says she needs space. I'm on the road five days a week. So that confuses me.
Anyway wasted enough time thinking about her. This thing with Bingwen and Bleached Evil is scary. Bleached Evil has been Hemisphere champion for eight months now. Not counting the period him and Combo Clay traded the belt four times in a month. Bleached Evil has dominated the competition. Both with his size and quickness. But also by having dedicated followers. Followers like
The tag team "Freefall" Johnny Cocaine and Ron Dynabul with their valet Donna Weed. Before meeting Bleached Evil they were lower on the card than me. My first win as Overdog was against Johnny Cocaine. He was Jonathon Summers then, a British wrestler with a smiley face sun on his trunks. Really good technician, but I beat him with the Overbulldog.
Then there was Ron Dynabull. He was another British wrestler named Strong Davis. When I wrestled him he was fifty pounds lighter than he is now. He was still a good bit bigger than me, but I got the better of him. I was a lot faster and pinned him with a victory roll.
A little bit after that match, Strong had his run in with the debuting Bleached Evil. Evil took him apart. After pinning him with the Bleach Blast, he shoved Strong Davis in a body bag and carried him off. A few weeks later he appeared as Ron Dynabul . He brutalized Jonathon Summers in a match on T*RN. Weeks later Summers had transformed into Johnny Cocaine. I did not even recognize him, til Scissor Mask pointed it out.
I don't know where Donna Weed came from. She is way too small and tiny to be a lady wrestler. But she follows Bleached Evil every where. She is willing to fight anybody for him. I remember when Cocaine and Dynabull wrestled DinoWAR. The Dinos valet Alosaur powerbombed her on the floor. It looked she was broke in half, but Roxi kept trying to get up.
As for Bleached Evil. I saw pictures of him wrestling in Japan in PWEYE. Called himself Opium X. He defeated Komodo Wizard for the WHY Heavyweight title. Legend has it X had developed an immunity to poison mist. So when Komodo spit the black mist in his face. Opium X simply hit him with the Poppi gun and pinned him.
He kept the WHY Belt for a long time. Til he lost it to King Behemoth at the Tokyo Dome. King even ripped his mask off. To this day Bleached Evil swears he was never Opium X. Pointing out that Opium X still works in Japan and WAVE. I asked King Behemoth about that a few weeks ago. Normally King B ignores me or says something mean when I ask him a question. But here he gave me a straight answer.
"I dunno about before that match or after. But that day at the Tokyo Dome, it was Bleached Evil under the hood. NOW GET THE HELL OUT!!!!"
He sure is grouchy using the bathroom.
Ready To leave the arena when a guy wearing a black tracksuit walks up and hands me a note.
"Your presence is requested by a Tribe Called Fist."
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 7
7.
This little maggot sure can take a beating. Called one of my boys in the states and he hooked me up with as much information on this Overdog as he could. Wrestled as a curtain jerker for years, then started working under a hood calling himself the Overdog. What the fuck is a Overdog?
Going by his record a loser. But man he sure can take a beating. He must have wrestled King Behemoth twenty times. I wrestled that fat fuck three times and that was enough for me. Hell I remember the promoter giving me a choice of defending against Behemoth at the Orange Bowl show or this new guy named Ransom Fortune.
I remember Behemoth beat Fortune pretty handily at a show in LA, so I figured I would just stomp that guitar playing fruit and deal with King Behemoth later.
Too bad I didn't know Ransom Fortune was a double crossing queer. Lost my belt that night and everything went down hill. Could not get a fair rematch if my life depended on it. Yeah all down hill.......
Can't believe that fossil the Masked Confederate is still around. That old fucker was ancient, when he cheated me out of my wrecker mask. This Overdog does not do anything well. Not very fast or strong or even much technique. But he has got something alright. He's tough, he keeps trying to get up no matter how much he gets beaten on. Even when that black Sasquatch was trying to kill him. He kept getting up. Reminds me of my feud with Tyranos the Titan. That bastard was even bigger than that Monolith guy. Lot faster too. He was determined to take the Omniversal title from me.
We had a three match series in Madison Square Garden. First match was a count out. He threw me around like I was a rag doll. I couldn't do anything to slow him down. I try to hit him with the Bayonet tackle and somehow I hit the referee by accident. Wouldn't you know it, I got disqualified all over an accident.
So we met again a month later. Things are not going much better. He is killing me with suplexes and slams. We are outside the ring and I clamp on the Sargelock. Oh I got it locked on good. But he is so big and strong he is carrying me around. Right when he smashes my body into the turnbuckle the bell rings. We both got counted out and I kept my belt.
So here it is me vs that big bastard in a cage. Well this time ole Sarge ain't playing around. I go right after his eyes and hit low blows whenever I can. All those people were cheering me, like I had returned from the grave. But Titan was tough and came back a swinging. He busted my nose, split my lip and blacked both my eyes. Next day I was a walking welt. But I'm the best and I found a way to win.
Nobody knew this but I had an ether rag. I made it look like it was just to towel me off. Had to be real careful. I play possum and when he goes to finish me, I lock on the Sargelock and put the rag on him. He fights like an animal, but it doesn't matter. I knocked out the unbeatable Titan.
That night I met the toy company that made the wizard cartoon, or was it about a dog pound. Anyway I became a legend off of that series of matches.
So this Overdog managed to win a battle royal. Looks like he played possum, after everybody threw out Behemoth. Kid is petty shrewd.
Look at him beat that fat piece of shit with that chair. That is fucking great. Kid is a psycho. Yeah I can work with this.
This little maggot sure can take a beating. Called one of my boys in the states and he hooked me up with as much information on this Overdog as he could. Wrestled as a curtain jerker for years, then started working under a hood calling himself the Overdog. What the fuck is a Overdog?
Going by his record a loser. But man he sure can take a beating. He must have wrestled King Behemoth twenty times. I wrestled that fat fuck three times and that was enough for me. Hell I remember the promoter giving me a choice of defending against Behemoth at the Orange Bowl show or this new guy named Ransom Fortune.
I remember Behemoth beat Fortune pretty handily at a show in LA, so I figured I would just stomp that guitar playing fruit and deal with King Behemoth later.
Too bad I didn't know Ransom Fortune was a double crossing queer. Lost my belt that night and everything went down hill. Could not get a fair rematch if my life depended on it. Yeah all down hill.......
Can't believe that fossil the Masked Confederate is still around. That old fucker was ancient, when he cheated me out of my wrecker mask. This Overdog does not do anything well. Not very fast or strong or even much technique. But he has got something alright. He's tough, he keeps trying to get up no matter how much he gets beaten on. Even when that black Sasquatch was trying to kill him. He kept getting up. Reminds me of my feud with Tyranos the Titan. That bastard was even bigger than that Monolith guy. Lot faster too. He was determined to take the Omniversal title from me.
We had a three match series in Madison Square Garden. First match was a count out. He threw me around like I was a rag doll. I couldn't do anything to slow him down. I try to hit him with the Bayonet tackle and somehow I hit the referee by accident. Wouldn't you know it, I got disqualified all over an accident.
So we met again a month later. Things are not going much better. He is killing me with suplexes and slams. We are outside the ring and I clamp on the Sargelock. Oh I got it locked on good. But he is so big and strong he is carrying me around. Right when he smashes my body into the turnbuckle the bell rings. We both got counted out and I kept my belt.
So here it is me vs that big bastard in a cage. Well this time ole Sarge ain't playing around. I go right after his eyes and hit low blows whenever I can. All those people were cheering me, like I had returned from the grave. But Titan was tough and came back a swinging. He busted my nose, split my lip and blacked both my eyes. Next day I was a walking welt. But I'm the best and I found a way to win.
Nobody knew this but I had an ether rag. I made it look like it was just to towel me off. Had to be real careful. I play possum and when he goes to finish me, I lock on the Sargelock and put the rag on him. He fights like an animal, but it doesn't matter. I knocked out the unbeatable Titan.
That night I met the toy company that made the wizard cartoon, or was it about a dog pound. Anyway I became a legend off of that series of matches.
So this Overdog managed to win a battle royal. Looks like he played possum, after everybody threw out Behemoth. Kid is petty shrewd.
Look at him beat that fat piece of shit with that chair. That is fucking great. Kid is a psycho. Yeah I can work with this.
British Bulldog vs Eddy Guerrero
Eddie Guerrero vs. British Bulldog-European title
Uploaded by Stinger1981. - Basketball, baseball, pro wrestling and more sports videos.
I remember watching this match back in 2000. I was happy to see Bulldog back on TV. He had been out for awhile. I really thought he was going to win the European title here. Instead it was a double count out and this was the last time Bulldog was seen in a large wrestling promotion.
Bulldog looks better than he did months before.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 6
6.
Bell just rang and I think I'm in a four way dance of death. Two kinds of four way matches.
1.Sudden death, first guy to pin somebody wins.
2. Elimination you have to eliminate everybody.
First guy running down the ramp is the Warden. Big black guy. Dresses like a Sheriff and carries a gavel. Never really got how that makes him a Warden. Been too scared to ask. I lunge at him and he hits me in the gut with that gavel. Try to get up and he kicks me in the head. I hit him in the stomach and it hardly bothers him. He knees me in the gut and suplexes me on the ramp. Before he can pin me, Murder Ranger jumps over the guardrail and clotheslines him.
I need to do something, but before I can act, I get kicked in the head again and I'm back on the ground. It's SAWdust. He tosses me into the ring. Now he is tossing different weapons into the ring. He is trying to slide a table in. I take the chance and dropkick the table into his face. This got a good response from the fans. I'm about to hold my arms up and celebrate when I get dropped on my head. Its Murder Ranger. He picks me up and suplexes me. Now he is dropping elbow after elbow on to my chest. Flak jacket is absorbing some of the blows, but not enough.
That's right, I do have my flak jacket. He picks me up and HONK!!!!!!!! I blow the air horn in his face. That confuses him for a few seconds. I slide under his legs, only to get hit with a spinebuster by the Warden. He goes to pin me and SAWdust breaks a wooden pallet over his head. Speaking of SAWdust, he got that table set up in the corner. He props me up against it. Before he can do anything, Murder Ranger cracks his skull with a steel chair.
Oh no Murder Ranger just spotted me. He charges, I take the silly foam out of the jacket and spray it on the mat. Murder Ranger just slipped on it and I duck before he goes thru the table. I pin him 1....2...3!!!!!
I did it?? I won?? I'm still the Deathcore champion. As I see SAWdust and the Warden get up I wondered if that was a good thing.
Bell just rang and I think I'm in a four way dance of death. Two kinds of four way matches.
1.Sudden death, first guy to pin somebody wins.
2. Elimination you have to eliminate everybody.
First guy running down the ramp is the Warden. Big black guy. Dresses like a Sheriff and carries a gavel. Never really got how that makes him a Warden. Been too scared to ask. I lunge at him and he hits me in the gut with that gavel. Try to get up and he kicks me in the head. I hit him in the stomach and it hardly bothers him. He knees me in the gut and suplexes me on the ramp. Before he can pin me, Murder Ranger jumps over the guardrail and clotheslines him.
I need to do something, but before I can act, I get kicked in the head again and I'm back on the ground. It's SAWdust. He tosses me into the ring. Now he is tossing different weapons into the ring. He is trying to slide a table in. I take the chance and dropkick the table into his face. This got a good response from the fans. I'm about to hold my arms up and celebrate when I get dropped on my head. Its Murder Ranger. He picks me up and suplexes me. Now he is dropping elbow after elbow on to my chest. Flak jacket is absorbing some of the blows, but not enough.
That's right, I do have my flak jacket. He picks me up and HONK!!!!!!!! I blow the air horn in his face. That confuses him for a few seconds. I slide under his legs, only to get hit with a spinebuster by the Warden. He goes to pin me and SAWdust breaks a wooden pallet over his head. Speaking of SAWdust, he got that table set up in the corner. He props me up against it. Before he can do anything, Murder Ranger cracks his skull with a steel chair.
Oh no Murder Ranger just spotted me. He charges, I take the silly foam out of the jacket and spray it on the mat. Murder Ranger just slipped on it and I duck before he goes thru the table. I pin him 1....2...3!!!!!
I did it?? I won?? I'm still the Deathcore champion. As I see SAWdust and the Warden get up I wondered if that was a good thing.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 5
5.
My first title defense against Skull-1 taught me something. I am not properly equiped to be Deathcore champion. But I am not a fan of swinging chairs and even my mentor Tiny Woods, would never approve of barbwire. So I had to start thinking of weapons that would fit me. First thing I bought was a flak jacket. It would provide at least a little protection from barbwire and I could load it with weapons. I filled it with things like powder for blinding guys briefly, salt for blinding guys longer, rope for tieing up a guys legs and a net. I have a few other goodies, that I'm saving for other occasions.
My match with SAWdust really put me thru the wringer. Another thing I learned fast was being in this division puts a target on your back. That first night as I was walking to my car, I was jumped by SAWdust, Murder Ranger and the Warden. They beat me the poop outta me and locked me in the trunk. I woulda been there all night, if Bantam had not found me and unlocked it. He did not make any small talk. At least I get why they are avoiding me. Nobody wants to be around the Deathcore psychos. If I had thought about it, I would remember I was the same way. Not like I helped Johnny J when the Murder Ranger was mauling him.
The next week at R*PPED those three approach me again. This time I pick up a table leg I found. They just laugh and tell me that was my initiation. I laugh with them, until I thumb Murder Ranger in the eye, kneed Warden in the groin, then threw him into SAWdust and took off running.
I thought I lost them before I realize I just ran thru the curtain that leads to the ring and the bell just rang. Uh oh my second title defense had started.
My first title defense against Skull-1 taught me something. I am not properly equiped to be Deathcore champion. But I am not a fan of swinging chairs and even my mentor Tiny Woods, would never approve of barbwire. So I had to start thinking of weapons that would fit me. First thing I bought was a flak jacket. It would provide at least a little protection from barbwire and I could load it with weapons. I filled it with things like powder for blinding guys briefly, salt for blinding guys longer, rope for tieing up a guys legs and a net. I have a few other goodies, that I'm saving for other occasions.
My match with SAWdust really put me thru the wringer. Another thing I learned fast was being in this division puts a target on your back. That first night as I was walking to my car, I was jumped by SAWdust, Murder Ranger and the Warden. They beat me the poop outta me and locked me in the trunk. I woulda been there all night, if Bantam had not found me and unlocked it. He did not make any small talk. At least I get why they are avoiding me. Nobody wants to be around the Deathcore psychos. If I had thought about it, I would remember I was the same way. Not like I helped Johnny J when the Murder Ranger was mauling him.
The next week at R*PPED those three approach me again. This time I pick up a table leg I found. They just laugh and tell me that was my initiation. I laugh with them, until I thumb Murder Ranger in the eye, kneed Warden in the groin, then threw him into SAWdust and took off running.
I thought I lost them before I realize I just ran thru the curtain that leads to the ring and the bell just rang. Uh oh my second title defense had started.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Savage Sports Stories Day 4
4.
I'm in this garbage dump of a motel in Vietnam. I pretty much live in this fucking country now. Ain't that funny. Sergent Sargent famous slayer of commies, forced to wrestle for pennies in Vietcong wrestling leagues. Oh brother do they hate me. But for good reason, because I beat every gook they throw in front of me. Like tonight I beat this guy called Lightning Lord in front of 5,000 rice eaters. Pretty big crowd for one of these leagues. Nothing compared to my hay day. Hell I remember back in 78, me and that old cracker Confederate drew 15,000 to some football stadium. Of course that old fucker tossed a fireball in my face to beat me. I lost my Wrecker mask that day. But that old creep did me a favor. Within a year or two I beat Ron Neighbors for the WAVE Omniversal Championship. A year after that I started doing that horse cartoon or helicopters hell I can't remember. I just know the dough was rolling in.
Well that was a long fucking time ago. Now I can't get work in North America or Japan. You miss one or two dates and try to drown a promoter and you're "Unreliable". So I wrestle in Vietnam. I have a collection of their title belts. The Vietnam Wrestling League , The Wrestling League Vietnam and League of Vietnam wrestling titles.
So anyway this Lightning Lord was the next hot thing.They put everything in the great yellow hope to beat evil old Sergent Sargent. But I feigned fear. I made him run a gauntlet of all the top contenders. Hell he even beat One Man Army. OMA usually stops these upstarts cold.
We get to our big match and I kick his yellow head in. It was fun seeing all those little maggots lose hope as I beat the hell out of their hero. Felt great even if he did mess my knee up, with one of those new style submission holds. I kicked him in the face to get out of it and wrenched my knee out of place to do it. Then I hit my Bayonet tackle for the win.
Laying in bed and what do you know Wrestling is on. its that W*RE promotion. I remember that Johansen jerk trying to get me to jump with him. Who was he kidding no guaranteed money and I would have to wrestle guys like Brent Stone and the N-Bomber. Nope I just stayed in WAVE. Would still be there if Ransom Fortune would have gave me a fair chance. Instead he went crying to the board because I tried to stab him with a bayonet.
So now I see this skinny wimp in a dog mask and he has a fucking belt!!!
Mark Chambers: Overdog last week you won your first title. This week you defended it successfully against Skull-1. How are you feeling.
Overdog: Well Mr.Chambers I'm happy to be a champion. But i'm not happy to of been attacked by Bingwen and Bleached Evil after the match. I wish I knew what happened to my friend.
Mark Chambers: I just recived word you will defend that title at Valley of the Brawls against "The Fire Rat" Bingwen.
Overdog: What uh oh geez. This is uh not um.....
Mark Chambers: Well one thing before you go. We have been getting more letters asking about you. Tell us who are some of your wrestling heroes.
Overdog: Well obviously I was a Ransom Fortune fan and Desecration was my favorite tag team. But my hero was Sergent Sargent. He was a true American hero and I hope I can be half the wrestler he was.
Mark Chambers: Oh wow Sergent Sargent. That is uh great.... REMEMBER VALLEY OF THE BRAWLS DEATHCORE TITLE FIRE RAT VS OVERDOG!!!! We will be right back....
Well well looks like Sarge is going back home sooner than he thought.
I'm in this garbage dump of a motel in Vietnam. I pretty much live in this fucking country now. Ain't that funny. Sergent Sargent famous slayer of commies, forced to wrestle for pennies in Vietcong wrestling leagues. Oh brother do they hate me. But for good reason, because I beat every gook they throw in front of me. Like tonight I beat this guy called Lightning Lord in front of 5,000 rice eaters. Pretty big crowd for one of these leagues. Nothing compared to my hay day. Hell I remember back in 78, me and that old cracker Confederate drew 15,000 to some football stadium. Of course that old fucker tossed a fireball in my face to beat me. I lost my Wrecker mask that day. But that old creep did me a favor. Within a year or two I beat Ron Neighbors for the WAVE Omniversal Championship. A year after that I started doing that horse cartoon or helicopters hell I can't remember. I just know the dough was rolling in.
Well that was a long fucking time ago. Now I can't get work in North America or Japan. You miss one or two dates and try to drown a promoter and you're "Unreliable". So I wrestle in Vietnam. I have a collection of their title belts. The Vietnam Wrestling League , The Wrestling League Vietnam and League of Vietnam wrestling titles.
So anyway this Lightning Lord was the next hot thing.They put everything in the great yellow hope to beat evil old Sergent Sargent. But I feigned fear. I made him run a gauntlet of all the top contenders. Hell he even beat One Man Army. OMA usually stops these upstarts cold.
We get to our big match and I kick his yellow head in. It was fun seeing all those little maggots lose hope as I beat the hell out of their hero. Felt great even if he did mess my knee up, with one of those new style submission holds. I kicked him in the face to get out of it and wrenched my knee out of place to do it. Then I hit my Bayonet tackle for the win.
Laying in bed and what do you know Wrestling is on. its that W*RE promotion. I remember that Johansen jerk trying to get me to jump with him. Who was he kidding no guaranteed money and I would have to wrestle guys like Brent Stone and the N-Bomber. Nope I just stayed in WAVE. Would still be there if Ransom Fortune would have gave me a fair chance. Instead he went crying to the board because I tried to stab him with a bayonet.
So now I see this skinny wimp in a dog mask and he has a fucking belt!!!
Mark Chambers: Overdog last week you won your first title. This week you defended it successfully against Skull-1. How are you feeling.
Overdog: Well Mr.Chambers I'm happy to be a champion. But i'm not happy to of been attacked by Bingwen and Bleached Evil after the match. I wish I knew what happened to my friend.
Mark Chambers: I just recived word you will defend that title at Valley of the Brawls against "The Fire Rat" Bingwen.
Overdog: What uh oh geez. This is uh not um.....
Mark Chambers: Well one thing before you go. We have been getting more letters asking about you. Tell us who are some of your wrestling heroes.
Overdog: Well obviously I was a Ransom Fortune fan and Desecration was my favorite tag team. But my hero was Sergent Sargent. He was a true American hero and I hope I can be half the wrestler he was.
Mark Chambers: Oh wow Sergent Sargent. That is uh great.... REMEMBER VALLEY OF THE BRAWLS DEATHCORE TITLE FIRE RAT VS OVERDOG!!!! We will be right back....
Well well looks like Sarge is going back home sooner than he thought.
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